Category Archives: Morsels of Wisdom

Hard Working. Alpha-Male. Jackhammer.

(Title courtesy of Dwight Shrute.)

You guys!  There are totally sweet motivational The Office posters available free for download on the TBS website.  Excuse me while I print out this puppy:

This one, and others, located here!

I came across this site while hunting for a picture of the motivational poster up on The Office’s set.  I’ve been noticing it for a while now… it’s a picture of a sailboat and it says like, “ACHIEVEMENT” on it or something along those lines.  If anyone knows what I’m talking about, please let me know.

Columbia Business School to Students: “I need you to take a shower today.”

Via Gawker: Remember that scene from Wet Hot American Summer?  Well it turns out that that the Columbia Business School is reenacting it with its students.  An actual CUBiz memo is going viral that implores its students to please consider their personal hygene.

In addition to not showering, the students are also apparently committing serious crimes of fashion, including wearing “tacky cufflinks,” rain boots, and non-flesh colored hosiery, which, according to the memo, gives potential employers the wrong impression.  What would the sons of Knickerbocker think?

Full memo available here.

How to Get a Job Without Experience

I don’t like to rely too much on other people’s work, but toothpaste for dinner has done it again.

Taking Time Out of My Delayed Adulthood to Discuss the NYT Article

Posted by Jessica

I mean, I should talk about it, right?  Everyone else seems to be.

So here’s my two cents.

I think the article itself is less dangerous than some of the commentary that has followed.  I think it might have a few good points.  And I think that it’s interesting – and necessary –  to bring a sociological point of view to the story.

The truth of the matter is as long as there are zero jobs out there for people my age, and as long as the few jobs that might be available provide salaries that are way below the cost of living, 20-somethings are going to rely on their families for financial support.  I mean, doesn’t that make sense?

It also stands to reason that we would be extremely “self-focused” at this time in our lives.  First of all, we don’t have families of our own. We’re just looking out for ourselves.  It’s our full-time job to engage in a hustle: sending out resumes, trying to sell ourselves, taking whatever jobs we can get for however long our employers will let us keep them, and always trying to keep our eyes on our own personal futures.  There’s a lot of uncertainty in our lives, and the thought of what may be down the road, at least for me, is sometimes the only thing that can keep me centered, and to keep my eyes on the prize.  And we’ve just come off a high of probably the most self-indulgent time in our lives: college.

I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t spent some time looking like these disaffected youths (common characteristic: bed head.)  But in the meantime, I’ve held about five or six jobs over the course of the past year.  There is zero stability in my life (besides the fact that I have a place to live at mom and dad’s), so yeah, I’ll frolic in a field or play some bananagrams or whatever the fuck these kids are doing in these photos to ground myself in the meantime.  That’s not how I spend the bulk of my existence.

I think there’s even some freedom in boomeranging.  Because I currently don’t have to worry about the rent, I have the option of taking jobs that might be a little more enjoyable and pay a little less.  I mean, I might as well.  Otherwise I’d probably go nuts (example: my most current job, which I don’t have anymore, btw. )

So yes, I can’t speak for the psychological points in the article, but I can say that we’re all really victims of circumstance.

Also I’m really pissed that the author stole my idea for a post about the boomerangers of summer TV.  I might just write one anyway.

Anyway, that’s just my (probably poorly developed) gut reaction.  I’d be interested in hearing what some others of you might have to say about the matter.

I also want to point out Amanda Marcotte’s gorgeous rebuttal to Salon’s take on the article.  It’s almost like what I would say, only way better.  Also if you have a chance to go check out the Salon piece, some of the comments are absolutely precious.

A Scary and Important PSA in Which I Offer Only a Little Advice

Posted by Jessica

Okay, I don’t know how I want to say this, or what I want to say about it, but something horrible and serious happened to me on the train last night involving the man sitting next to me.

I think I handled the situation well, in that I got out of there and reported what happened to the authorities, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t still pretty freaked out.

It’s really hard to offer advice on what to do to avoid these situations both because I am naive and don’t think they happen that often, and because I’m not sure of how I could have prevented this situation.

But I guess what I’m try to say is, if you’re a woman boomeranger (or maybe just a person who takes the train), PLEASE, for my sake if not your own, be careful.  Be aware of the person next to you.  Don’t sit by the window if you can help it so you can get out if you need to.  Always solicit the help of the people around you, whether they are in uniform or just bystanders.  And employ my time-tested rule: always make a scene.  Most people that have the balls to do this crazy shit are too cowardly to stand there and be berated or caught.

I think that’s all I have to say about it.  Again, I am fine, but I just want to tell you all about it so that it might make some sort of difference.

CollegeHumor Helps Us Nail That Job Interview

… And become king of the company’s domain in the process.

Click here.

Does this Mean I Have to Move to Atlanta?

Posted by Jessica

HuffPo just posted the best and worst cities for recent grads to live out their dreams.  Not to give anything away, but it definitely confirmed my suspicions that I’m fighting a losing battle.

Link it up.

As I Try to Get Out To Enjoy the Weather…

Another Toothpaste for Dinner instant classic.

Project Runway Tells Us to Blame Our Unemployment on Beyoncé

Posted by Jessica

I don’t know if all of you saw Project Runway last night, but it was pretty upsetting.  I’m not going to spoil anything (although the links I’m about to post will — proceed with caution), but sometimes the judges just get it wrong.

The charm and comic relief in the episode was, as usual, provided by contestant Anthony Williams.  His shining moment of TV quote glory came about half way through the show, as he was realizing that his jacket design was going awry.  His deflection?  Blame it on Beyoncé.  He says:

You know, I blame Beyoncé for everything that goes wrong in my life.  It’s something about her songs that will make you think, first of all, that you are a size 4, that you can conquer the world, and then, I don’t know, you are all powerful.  Do you think Beyoncé has a song for people who can’t find a job, or the interview that you didn’t do so well in?  Does she sing any songs about that?

(Watch clip #4 to hear it in his mesmerizing Southern drawl.)

That’s right, you guys.  Beyoncé is giving you false expectations.

Anthony defended his statement in an interview with Entertainment Weekly, explaining:

The thing I think I was talking about was, Beyoncé’s music is so empowering that you end up listening to it and believing your ass can take over the world. And that’s how I ended up on Project Runway, thinkin’ I could just take over the world… That is her fault because she made me believe that I could do it. Her, Barack, and Oprah. All of them.

So I guess the moral of the story is, the next time you’re sitting around your house listening to Irreplaceable, just do yourself a favor and be sure to balance it out with some Dashboard Confessional or something.  Maybe it’ll teach you not to dream so big.

Next year in Jerusalem, or Maybe Just Not at Mom and Dad’s

Posted by Jessica

Well it seems as though Spring has finally arrived. I’m gonna lean on Dinosaur Comics for a little perspective here (as I usually do whenever something important happens.)

As a person who has already spent the winter watching more TV than maybe she’d prefer, here’s to hoping that next winter is filled with a little less free time.

Click the image to blow it up!